Chemo: so much to enjoy!

So, my benefit was on Sunday and it was amazing. Over $4,000 was raised to help pay my medical bills, and the generosity of others was so inspiring to see. Jen Owens, Angela Hall, Kristin Green, Liz Rider, Angie Fincham, Mickie Byers, Jenn Fogle, Monica Hjelmeland, and many others worked together to pull off the event and I will forever be grateful. There were a ton of great items available at the silent auction, so to all the companies and individuals who donated I owe a world of thanks as well! On Sunday, after I got home, I was inspired to show my appreciation to Jen with a love poem that I posted on her Facebook wall. I think the poem is really pretty impressive, so I'll share it with all of you here:

An Ode to Jen Owens

When I told you I had cancer you were so sad;

But then, in the blink of an eye, you were working like mad!

You put together a calendar for meals,

And said prayers for a body that heals.

You realized the treatment expenses the budget would kill,

So you planned a benefit to pay all the bills!

Such a generous, loving, wonderful friend you are,

I really wish I could buy you a car!

From this day forward you have my heart,

To our retirement in Florida and death do us part.

Most people know that my upcoming chemo session on Friday has been getting me down. But then, driving along on my way to physical therapy yesterday, "Today is the Day" played on the radio. The following lyrics really stuck out:

 

And I won't worry about tomorrow
I'm giving You my fears and sorrows
Where You lead me I will follow
I'm trusting in what You say

Hearing those lyrics I kind of felt dumb. Why was I wasting time worrying about something in the future when I can hand those fears over to God? Seriously. It is so easy to lose perspective and then something as simple as a song brings it all back together. And then, to top it all off, in my class at church tonight there was a lot of discussion about enjoying God by enjoying the things that have been made through his creative handiwork. So, can I actually enjoy chemo? Can I find the positive in the poison that is pumped through my body and makes me so sick? God gave somebody (who I still think is kind of a jerk) the brilliant mind to develop a means to kill cancer cells. Granted, the process isn't perfect, but it works. I also am fortunate enough to live in a country where chemotherapy is an option. I am also blessed with a job that provides me with the sick time I need to be away for extended periods of time. That same job also helps pay for the health insurance that covers most of the expense. So, in the end, I think I can try to enjoy chemo. This is a change in perspective but is necessary if I am going to survive the next several months.

 

In other news, my hair is starting to fall out. I'll have Joy shave my head eventually, but I don't know when. I guess I'll just wait until I start to look really ridiculous.

 

Today at work one of my colleagues left the office for a recruiting trip. I was pretty jealous. Fall recruitment travel is one of the things I really enjoy about my job, and it is something that I am not able to do this year for obvious reasons. I love getting out in the beautiful fall weather and exploring different college campuses. Students interested in the health sciences are typically a delight to talk with (although some are really dumb and that's fun too). I have been to a lot of college campuses across the country and I just love them (well, assuming there is decent parking). I love the campuses at Michigan State and the University of Illinois. Schools in Utah have great scenery, and the Mormon schools are especially interesting (I would visit BYU every semester if I could!). The most lost I have ever been on a college campus was at University of Colorado Boulder, and the town I was the most hopelessly lost in was El Paso, Texas (probably not super safe, either). I enjoy visiting rural towns the best, but I can definitely handle myself in Chicago traffic (but am challenged in hailing a cab). When I arrive at my hotel room at the end of a busy day there is nothing more satisfying than laying on a nice king-sized bed, pantsless, watching HGTV and eating junk food from a gas station. I really know how to live.

I'll keep you all posted on how chemo goes, when the hair is gone, and the other ramblings of my mind! Thanks for reading!